How Will Jalen Ramsey Ever Recover From These Burns?

Jaguars cornerback Jalen Ramsey did us all the favor of telling GQ exactly which NFL quarterbacks are bad trash and which are actually good. Ramsey’s takes were entertaining and refreshing on their own, but they have also provided us with another level of entertainment: each maligned quarterback being asked to respond to Ramsey’s assessment of their skills.

Bills quarterback Josh Allen, who got the most shit dumped on him, gave a diplomatic answer straight out of the Anodyne Athlete Interview Guide Book, telling reporters that he doesn’t “care one bit” about what Ramsey has to say because they aren’t teammates. Boooo!

The Ravens were off today, so we’ll have to wait to see what Joe Flacco has to say about Ramsey claiming that he “sucks.” It doesn’t look like anyone has asked Matt Ryan for a direct response yet, but Falcons head coach Dan Quinn brushed off the comments the same way Allen did, telling reporters that the Falcons don’t need “anyone else outside our building to help get us ready.”

Come on, this is boring! Where are the epic clapbacks? Where is the burn sauce? Eli Manning, please help us out:

God, never mind.

What about, uh, Matt Stafford’s wife, Kelly? Maybe she has some heat:

Oh, forget it.