Zion Williamson’s shoe exploded Wednesday night, in the first minute of the big Duke game against North Carolina, and Zion hurt his knee on the play. For most people, this is rotten news for human or basketball reasons; for screeching brandwraith Darren Rovell, this is the single most exhilarating thing that could’ve happened tonight, his own big moment.
These aren’t even all of his tweets about the shoe. Obviously there is almost no point in telling Rovell to calm down—this is a man who spends a portion of every day scolding Twitter for not charging him money. Still, man, calm down.