Hey, casual soccer fan! You're likely going to remember Mario Götze as the guy who won the 2014 World Cup for Germany, but you should know that he was famous long before he scored last night's deciding goal. That's because he once got a big ol' boner while hanging out on a boat with a lady.
It's true. That's him in the picture above, sporting his boner in front of his lady, God, and the world. We don't even need Boner Rower to tell us if that's a real boner. That's definitely a boner.