The "stink" coming out of its glands could have been in the shape of Mexico somehow. Read more
My full quote, which is a little kinder than the stray pieces in Rob's story would indicate: Read more
But the issue is that Avril, from the onset of her career, was presented as Smarter Than This. A down-to-earth, punk-ish, unsullied, refreshingly "real" antidote to the vapid Britney/Xtina/etc. antics that marred the turn of the century. Read more
Late Late Show is the only late night show I watch - I gave up on Conan fairly early on after the move to TBS, because after watching Ferguson's interview style it was just impossible to handle the canned, rehearsed interviews on typical late night shows. I haven't missed an episode since I stumbled onto his show one… Read more
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The NBA playoffs start tomorrow, and they are the absolute best time of year. To celebrate that, here are some of…
A friend of mine was born without his right hand. He has a small "nub" instead. When he was young, he used a prosthetic hand that he didn't like very much. We were on a soccer team for 6 and 7 year olds, and during one game he was using his prosthetic hand (and had had it on all day) when it became uncomfortable. So… Read more
When I was in 4th grade, I became a kickball legend. I was playing 2nd base, with runners on 1st and 2nd base, with no outs. Anyway, up comes the opposing team captain and he kicks a screaming line drive right to me (out #1). I catch the ball chest high, center mass. I pivot slightly to my right and notice the the… Read more
I fixed a lot of fights over the years. In two I didn't fix but should have, people paid heavily for my…
So Drew asked me to fill in for him on this week's Funbag, because apparently as an unemployed former punter I'm…
Good news: No matter how you do your seasonal accounting, it's definitely spring now. You're already kinda bored…
The old saying says that it's not illegal if you don't get caught. In baseball, sometimes it isn't illegal even if…
This is it. This is the showdown we've waited an entire year for (OK, more like five months). In one corner, we have…
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I had one then twins. We went from being on the power play to a penalty killing situation over night. My mother in law came down for a few months, so our goalie play was key. Read more
I hear that zone defense analogy all the time, and it's amusing and all, but I recently heard a much better analogy from a coworker. He said that really, you just keep playing man-to-man defense and at all times one kid is just dunking on your ass. Not always the same kid necessarily, but there's always one… Read more
Every few years, there's a big Hot Sports Take orgy because a pro athlete decided to skip a game for a birth and/or…
The thing about writing a piece in which you lay out the reasons why you appreciate a player even though there are legitimate criticisms to be made of him is that you see a dumbfuck comment like this and get exasperated over just how stupid a lot of sports fans are, and just how little point there is in writing… Read more
Back when Stephen Colbert was on The Daily Show, he also used to do radio-ad voiceover work for extra money. I was a…