Based on ESPN’s file photo, you’d think Hancock would have a head for this sort of thing.

You’re so very, very wrong on the February birthday. Having one final thing to look forward to during the New Years-to-Easter Highway of Darkness really de-Shinings you. Read more

Mice fucking love stoves. You would think that a giant steel box full of fiberglass and hot fire and toxic gas would repel them, but nope. It beckons them. Read more

One time in college I woke up hungover to go to my internship. Hopping on a crowded D train, I moved towards an open space at the end of the car. Reaching it, a woman grabbed my arm and pointed to a huge pile of vomit that I otherwise would not, in my state, have noticed. I pressed back into the crowd and took in my… Read more

“I’m Armstrong, and all you’ve got is legs.” Read more

Best fishing gear/Father’s Day gift is a puukko knife. Classy enough to be decorative, designed well enough to be useful, loaded with frosty and inexplicable Scandinavian sentiments of honor and respect that reflect a grown man’s often confusing relationship with the man who sired him. Read more

Just another note in my long file of things I would have done with Biff Tannen’s sports almanac. Read more

Called it. Read more

The chaw he has in is so fat people are using it as the punchline in “yo mama” jokes. Read more

Having shot one, I can attest that the safety features are from a time when radium in grain alcohol was sold as medicine. Read more

I’ve heard primarily bad things about their quality control since they got acquired by Cerberus in 2007. Before that the 870 was the shotgun, and it’s a shame to their reputation has suffered so much (also, Marlin). Read more

Yeesh. Read more

Magic Hat got screwed by the financial crisis in ‘08. IIRC they leveraged themselves pretty hard to buy Pyramid and when their capital firm tanked in ‘10 they got vultured up, sold and their founder ousted. Haven’t really been the same company since, esp since North American Breweries got bought by Florida Ice & Farm.… Read more

Better or worse than mixing A&W and Pabst in equally portions (Beer-beer)? Read more

Absolutely. Listen to powerlifters in the gym and bodybuilders in the kitchen. Read more

RIP College Fund. Read more

Your articles are better than my articles. Read more

This comment wins. Holy shit this comment wins the whole article. Read more