So the Navy has a laser cannon now. It's cool, I guess, except that it does not shoot any beams of light or make a "pew pew" noise or do any of the cool shit that a laser is supposed to do, really. Fictional lasers are much better. This is a ranking of fictional lasers.
- Lightsaber
- Ghostbusters proton pack laser
- Death Star laser
- X-Wing laser
- Predator shoulder-cannon laser
- Independence Day alien mothership laser
- Enterprise phaser cannon
- TIE Fighter laser
- Iron Man's gauntlet laser
- Millenium Falcon quad laser
- Goldfinger crotch laser
- DL-44 heavy-blaster-pistol laser
- Congo diamond laser
- Bowcaster laser
- E-11 blaster-rifle laser
- Klingon disruptor laser
- Ma'Tok staff laser
- Mars Attacks! laser
- Moonraker laser
- Chitauri Scepter laser
- Independence Day alien-fighter-craft laser
- Terminator T-800 laser rifle
- War of the Worlds tripod laser
- Real Genius laser
- Superman's eye laser
- Cyclops's eye laser
- Tron lasers
- James Bond's watch laser
- Star Trek phaser
- Being hit by a car
- Star Trek: The Next Generation phaser