Introducing the Deadspin Customer Service Hotline

2008 has been quite a year of change for Deadspin. Leitch out, Daulerio in. Exit Weintraub, enter Waxing Off. Goodbye Iracane, Hello Gaines. Yes, AJ has graciously asked me to step in and provide Deadspin with the same mediocre level of combudsmanship I've been providing for the past 4 months over at Deadspin's car-obsessed sibling Jalopnik (where we call it cotomer sevis, but the idea is the same).

With a new bouncer working the door here, now would be a good time to review the guidelines for commenting on Deadspin. As the site has changed, so have the commenters, by which I mean, there are a metric fuckton more of them now than there used to be, and not all of them are funny. And that's OK. Not everyone can be the next Big Daddy Balls, nor should everyone try. So, with those things in mind, here are the revised guidelines for Deadspin commenting:

1) Be funny.
2) At least be interesting.
3) Don't be not funny and not interesting.
4) Don't be a dick, unless you're being funny and/or interesting. This is especially true regarding any features or columns you find uninteresting. Sexism isn't funny unless it's being handled by the pros.
5) All other rules and prohibitions remain in effect until further notice.

With that unpleasantness out of the way, I'd also like to introduce the Deadspin Customer Service hotline. I am here to make your Deadspin-reading experience as painless as possible. Comments not showing up? Send me an email. Wondering why your account wasn't approved? Send me an email. Question about a site redesign? Send me an email. Need a good recipe for homemade beef jerky marinade? Send me an email. In other words, I'm here to help with any Deadspin or jerky-related questions you may have - until my job is outsourced to Bangalore, anyway. I can't guarantee my answer will make you happy or even be remotely correct, but I can guarantee you an answer.

Thank you for choosing Deadspin and have a great day.

(Editor's note: This is not the big change that I referenced on Friday that some of you — okay Artie Fufkin and 44 in a Row — picked up on. No, you'll know when that happens. Then you can yell at Pete. I'm told that whole thing has been "delayed.")