Learn How To Be An FC Cincinnati Fan With These Cringeworthy Videos

Cincinnatians: congratulations on your brand spanking new soccer team, the soon-to-be USL-dwelling FC Cincinnati! You probably have questions about your new club and how you can best prove that you are the biggest, loudest, most passionate FCC fan out there, being that the team is only a few hours old. Fret not: your trusty leaders have already compiled a couple neat videos that should have you ready to chant along with the lads (they do say lads in socc—sorry, football—right?) in no time!

Unsure of what to wear to the stadium? Curious about the appropriate in-stadium behavior? Want to know what cool chants to shout along with just like those wacky kids across the pond? Just hit play on the video below and all your questions will be answered (password to play the video: fcc).

Still need to settle on a rhythm for that “Oohhhhh FC Cincinnaaaaatiiiiii” one, but there’s time yet. Plus, by the time everyone is together in the stands, all snug in their cool scarves, no one will care about syllable counts, anyway.

Got that down? Swell! Now, ready to prove exactly how diehard you are about a team that literally didn’t exist just two days ago, has played nary a single match, and has yet to sign even one of the players that you already know you’ll love forever and ever and ever? Then you might already Be The One!

So much passion! Such awesome chants! So much colored dust in your face, hair, and eyes! I’m so excited I think I might throw up!