Military Physical Fitness Tests, Ranked

1. U.S. Marine Corps

  • 20 dead-hang pull-ups
  • 100 crunches within two minutes
  • 3-mile run, 18 minutes (6:00/mile)
  • Fresh-squeezed blood at hydration stations

2. Navy

  • Really doesn't want to come out of the pool
  • 87 pushups
  • 105 curl-ups (sit-up variant)
  • 1.5-mile run, 8:30 (5:26/mile)

3. Army

  • 71 pushups
  • 78 sit-ups
  • 2-mile run, 13 minutes (6:30/mile)
  • Recruiting waiver overhead press

4. Air Force

  • 67 push-ups within one minute
  • 58 sit-ups within one minute
  • 1.5-mile run, 9:36 (6:24/mile)
  • Calls barracks "dorms"

5. Boy Scout Troop 278, Kenosha, Wisc.

  • After homework is done
  • Still has a problem with the gays

6. Shady Hills Retirement Home Recreation Hour

  • Very active between 6:30 and 8:00 a.m.
  • Unprotected after-party

7. Coast Guard

  • Pastries
  • 29 pushups within one minute
  • 38 sit-ups within one minute
  • 1.5-mile run, 12:51 (8:34/mile)
  • Pastries