Because no one reads the newspaper and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day.
* Somebody's watching you....
* Cristiano Ronaldo talks about his World Cup loss: "I feel a broken man, completely disconsolate, frustrated and an unimaginable sadness." Keep going .... [The Guardian, via Dirty Tackle]
* Dwayne Collins the last pick of the 2010 NBA draft got the name "Mr. Irrelevant" tattooed on his hand. That will definitely impress people in job interviews. [MarkMcClune]
* The Philly Phanatic is the most sued mascot in all of sports. Who knew that unleashing an eight-foot tall manic depressive with poor eyesight into a crowd of old ladies and small children would be problematic? [Inquirer]
* Here's an awful story of a American family that visited South Africa for the World Cup, only to have a drunk driver kill one daughter and leave her brother in a medically-induced coma—with an insurance company that won't pay to fly him back to the States. Man, this planet really stinks sometimes. [Yahoo News]
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Last day. Let's make it a quick one.