Everyone knows that Mr. Met, unjustly persecuted this week, is the best mascot. What this ranking presupposes is: Of course he is, but we can prove it scientifically.
Deadspin staff members were asked to grade the North America Big Four pro sports mascots on scales of 1-10. Those scores were averaged. Ties were broken by throwing out the highest and lowest grades. Lame mascots no one had ever heard of were not included. Secondary mascots were not included, despite the pleas of one defender of DJ Kitty.
The rankings are binding and unassailable.
- Mr. Met 9.13 points
- Phillie Phanatic 8.31
- Benny the Bull 7.29
- Rocky (Nuggets) 7.07
- The Raptor 6.93
- Boltman (Chargers) 6.64
- The Swinging Friar (Padres) 6.60
- Youppi! 6.55
- The Oriole Bird 6.40
- The Coyote (Spurs) 6.27
- The Gorilla (Suns) 6.27
- Sluggerrr (Royals) 6.20
- N.J. Devil 6.18
- Hugo the Hornet 6.07
- Mariner Moose 5.87
- Bernie Brewer 5.73
- S.J. Sharkie 5.64
- Iceburgh (Penguins) 5.36
- Lou Seal (SF Giants) 5.33
- ThunderBug (Lightning) 5.30
- Viktor (Vikings) 5.18
- Swoop (Eagles) 5.18
- Orbit (Astros) 5.13
- The Pirate Parrot 5.13
- Moon Dog (Cavaliers) 5.07
- Sparky the Dragon (Islanders) 5.00
- Harvey the Hound (Flames) 5.00
- Mr. Redlegs (Reds) 5.00
- Clark the Cub 5.00
- Billy the Marlin 4.93
- Stuff the Magic Dragon (Magic) 4.93
- Jaxson de Ville (Jaguars) 4.92
- Fin (Canucks) 4.91
- Slamson (Sacramento Kings) 4.73
- Grizz 4.67
- Chomps (Browns) 4.45
- Sir Purr (Carolina Panthers) 4.45
- Dinger (Rockies) 4.43
- Stanley C. Panther (Florida Panthers) 4.36
- Sabretooth (Sabres) 4.18
- Pierre the Pelican 4.13
- Wildwing (Ducks) 4.10
- Bailey (L.A. Kings) 4.00
- K.C. Wolf (Chiefs) 4.00
- Roary (Lions) 3.91
- Miles (Broncos) 3.82
- Steely McBeam 3.82
- Bango the Buck 3.73
- Big Red (Arizona Cardinals) 3.70
- Freddie Falcon 3.64
- Blitz (Seahawks) 3.55
- T.C. Bear (Twins) 3.47
- Louie (Blues) 3.40
- T-Rac (Titans) 3.40
- Stinger (Blue Jackets) 3.33
- Staley Da Bear 3.27
- Sourdough Sam (49ers) 3.27
- Burnie (Heat) 3.27
- Raymond (Rays) 3.00
- Southpaw (White Sox) 2.93
- Tommy Hawk (Blackhawks) 2.91
- Blades (Bruins) 2.91
- Screech (Nationals) 2.88
- G-Wiz (Wizards) 2.80
- Pat Patriot 2.75
- Blue (Colts) 2.64
- Wally the Green Monster 2.53
- Slider (Indians) 2.40
- Getting run over by the Racing Presidents
- Fredbird (St. Louis Cardinals) 2.33