Would you get a load of that horror. I mean lean on in here and get a nice big load of it. That is a pair of tubs of pasta, dyed red and blue by Louisville's Skyline Chili locations as a... what? celebration? like hell! ...of the upcoming Louisville-Kentucky Sweet 16 matchup. Because Skyline Chili figures that if you were willing to slop their awful poo-food ("pood"?) into your face in the first place, you probably wouldn't mind if the starchy base happens to look like Plavalaguna's pubes.
Seems like an odd way to express school spirit. Here, behold!—how I suffer for my school! Health, pleasure, digestive comfort, dignity—these I sacrifice to the Spirit of the Wildcat, that He might show favor to His basketball avatars! At halftime I shall also sacrifice a toilet. Picture that awful blue shit with some brown chili on it, and with some yellow cheese on top of that. Imagine tasting that rainbow. If you can imagine something less appetizing than that, you probably belong in prison.
Anyway, since we've gotten into the business of ranking brightly-colored foodstuffs here at Foodspin, let's go ahead and rank Skyline's dyed noodles.
Skyline's Dyed Noodles, Ranked:
1. Being hit by a car
2. Red
3. Blue
What the hell is going on in Appalachia.
[Courier-Journal, h/t Katie]