Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day.
* Some teams just don't have respect for boundaries, you know? [Photo taken in Rochester, NY, by reader Adam]
* Phil Jackson did not attend the Lakers' victory parade, because he had a doctor's appointment that Phil Jackson, billionaire coach and 11-time World Champion, somehow could not find a way to reschedule. You know they charge $75 if you don't give them a day's notice! [Boston Herald]
* Meanwhile, NBA loser coach Doc Rivers says he's "leaning" toward a decision about his coaching future. I'm also leaning toward a decision about breakfast. Wouldn't you like to know what it is! [ESPN]
* Here's everything you ever wanted to know about R.A. Dickey's glove ... including who R.A. Dickey is and why you should give a crap about his glove. [NYTimes]
* Gene Weingarten intentionally picks the world's most adorable Twitter fight with Buzz B. Old people! Am I right? [Twitter]
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Tuesday. Still leaning ...