No. Just coffee, if I remember correctly. Never tried heroin. Read more

Well, the difference btw Mariotti that I've seen and, oh, every other sports columnist who writes things to agitate the readership is that even his phony contrarianism is phony. All this hub-bub being kicked up over his hiring at the SF Examiner is something he'll consider a win for the paper — and, hell, he's not… Read more

It was a teachable moment for everyone involved. Read more

You're not missing an obvious point - just consider that we wanted to take on Mariotti for an ongoing series that would have had a beginning and an ending. I was offering him to write something I hoped would be a little more personalized and drop the whole "annoyed know-it-all" schtick. He seemed open to that during… Read more

You're lucky, you know it, be quiet:

Oh I'm sorry. LANDOVER, MD. So the answer to your question is "never" because there isn't an NFL stadium located there. Read more

AGREED. Also I hate it when large families who've clearly been on a plane before just assume that because they are now a large family they can begin rooting around in their bags and take their shoes off and remove their laptops and giant plastic sacks of formula and makeup and mechanical devices at the very last… Read more

Nope. It's an empty gesture which only serves to make the person asking for a cigarette feel better about the request. If you're only gonna smoke one, just ask and I'll usually give it to you for free without any need for moronic small talk — even if it's my (GASP) LAST ONE. But for just $12 more you could go buy a… Read more

Agreed, fuck that. Why not just put a half-eaten sandwich in there, too, while you're at it? It will break up the monotony of cleaning out urinals for the stranger you've deemed subhuman. Read more

Good one. I'm taking it a step further and throwing at any person who isn't over the age of 70 or under the age of 10 who has two perfectly functioning legs for not climbing the goddamn escalator. Those who do this on the people movers should actually be hit with a bowling ball. Read more

9. Mango Read more

She's a monster. She must be stopped. Read more

Yep. Like finding the presence of WMDs in Iraq. Read more

Your pen game is tight. Respect. Read more

Worse than the "thank you" thing for me is when you find yourself in one of those double-door situations and you have the one held open and the person blows by you and uses the other one. "Oh, you got it, great, just checking, dickhead." Read more

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9. Mango Read more

Sound logic, strong list. The jogging thing always throw me though because I can never figure out what to actually say so then it just comes off like some lame smiling yawn. Read more

I usually end up missing and poking the person belly. But, yeah, just habit. Read more

And somewhere a fucking dinosaur runs across Elysium... Read more