We count the skulls that we see. That's an ancient proverb, probably. Read more

If he isn't drafted, chalk it up to the NFL's non-prophet status.
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You've got myself and Chvrches inverted in your comment. I figured I'd let you know sooner rather than later so you'd have time to correct it before Kinja locks you out. Read more

...the nerve to try and task my wife to help fix this abortion Read more

I have no idea if that Star Wars quote at the end is this guy's email signature, or if he just thought that would be the perfect zinger to end his scathing rant with. Read more

There is no way Will Leitch wrote this. I've heard of everyone on this list. Read more

Judging by the category, it seems he's going to make a break for it.

They've been allowing black people for quite a while now. Read more

Usually, the only time you see the Millionaires and the Senators get together is at Republican Congressional Committee fundraisers. Read more

They were the two millionaires until Obama got to them Read more

You know, people like to poke fun at Whitlock and call him lazy but he squats over 350 pounds every day . . . more than once if he ate Tex-Mex. Read more

I am guessing that you are a regular sports radio caller. Read more

FIELDER STATS Read more

"God told him to stay at the airport and don't do anything, just stay there." Read more

Denis: "I think it's getting..." [SNIFF] "...dusty in here." Read more

Donation target 1-877 KARS 4 KIDS has already rejected Incognito's gift, explaining that if they wanted to be associated with something horribly offensive to the human condition, they'd play one of their ads. Read more

This is the saddest list I've ever seen, including Schindler's. Read more

To be fair, everyone loses their shit after GoLean Fiber Twigs. Read more

TIM MARCHMAN DOES NOT SPEAK FOR THE REST OF THE DEADSPIN STAFF. Read more