There should be plenty of college basketball today for everyone. (Even you, Milton. Just pass.) But just in case the amateur hoops circuit isn't your thing, or you just got dumped by one of the Storming The Floor fellas, then perhaps you might want to crack open your old 5¼ floppy and play some Stunts.
Holy polygonal Christ. After that video, it immediately makes me want to quit Deadspin this weekend, fly back home to where my PC laptop lies, buy an external floppy drive, find my Stunts disk, and make a bunch of tracks and race Skid Vicious on every one of them. It seems like a lot of work, but it's potentially worth it.
The College Basketball Stuff
• 11:30 a.m. — CUSA Championship: Tulsa vs. Memphis [CBS]
• 12 noon — America East Championship: Hartford vs. UMBC [ESPN2]
• 1:30 p.m. — ACC Semifinal: Virginia Tech vs. North Carolina [ESPN]
• 2:00 p.m. — Big Ten Semifinal: Michigan State vs. Wisconsin [CBS]
• 2:00 p.m. — Big 12 Semifinal: Oklahoma vs. Texas [ESPN2]
• 3:30 p.m. — ACC Semifinal: Clemson vs. Duke [ESPN]
• 3:45 p.m. — Big Ten Semifinal: Illinois vs. Minnesota [CBS]
• 4:00 p.m. — Big 12 Semifinal: Texas A&M vs. Kansas [ESPN2]
• 4:00 p.m. — Mountain West Women's Championship: New Mexico vs. San Diego State [VS]
The Non College Basketball Stuff
• 2:30 p.m. — NASCAR Nationwide Series: Sharpie Mini 300, Bristol, Tenn. I see what they did there. Mini Sharpie. Mini racetrack. [ABC]
• 2:30 p.m. — Golf: Arnold Palmer Invitational. Half iced tea, half lemonade for everyone! [NBC]
• 2:00 p.m. — Pool: 2006 World Cup of Trick Shots. Always aim for the crotch. [ESPN Classic]
• 3:00 p.m. — Movie: Meatballs Part II. Yep. It's probably best to crack into your own DVD collection instead. [Comedy Central]
• 4:00 p.m. — Spring training: Cubs vs White Sox. Watch Double-A players valiantly hustle to try and make the Triple-A team. [WGN]